Do you have that mum friend who has it all together? She volunteers, she brings you coffee, always remembers snack, is always starting new events and programs, has perfect children or has wild children and yet she is still smiling and keeping her cool. Do you have that mum friend?
When was the last time you brought her tea or coffee? Brought a meal over? Instead of asking what she needed for help with something you just did it anyway? When was the last time you did any of these small things?
That mum has it all together right? She always has coffee in her hand anyway, right? She has great kids, great marriage, and is always there for everyone else, so you don’t need to check in on her, right?
Maybe this mum has all these qualities or does all these things but maybe she talks too much, is too loud, it too generic, still manages to be anti-social or too social. Maybe she doesn’t seem genuine. Maybe she has a flaw, or flaws, and you just don’t feel the need or obligation to help, check in, whatever it is.
Just remember you have flaws too.
There are plenty of people I don’t hit it off with, are not a ‘fan of’, or I don’t seem to like. There are plenty of people who somehow manage to talk more than I do or are louder than me-I should be admiring these people instead of being annoyed with them, honestly. I know first hand I am a pretty annoying person and yet I somehow am surrounded by wonderful people.
The thing is, everyone gets down. Everyone get worn out. Everyone is stressed and everyone is failing at something. The loudest and quietest person could still have moments of sadness for no reason or full-blown depression. You never know, and I’m not saying it is our business to know what someone’s mental health diagnoses is; But we can still check in, right? Despite the perfection, the wild children, the personalities we do not completely clash with, we can still offer a hand. We can still pick one day out of the whole year to offer snack help. We can still lend a hand when we are at the same activity. We can still do something even though we hear the words ‘No, I’m all set’. Even if it is bringing over that extra cup of tea.
Something little goes a very long way, you just may not know it.
In the end, maybe everything in that mum’s life is exactly like it seems. Doesn’t mean that for one quick moment you can’t do a tiny something extra. While the words may not be there, it does not go unnoticed. Every little kind thing you do does not go unnoticed.
You do not go unnoticed.